Wisdom from the Woods – Life Lessons Learned from Being Open-Minded

If laughter is infectious, may we all come down with a bad case of it. I only make New Year’s resolutions I’m certain to keep. My past successful commitments to myself include; drink more beer, spend more time with my dog and upset stupid people regularly. This year, I resolve to enjoy my life even more. As part of that purpose, I’ve decided to impart more humor through wisdom. After all, some pretty hysterical stuff happens to me every day in West Virginia and I learn as much from happiness as hurt. So here goes. Recently, while trippin’ on some amazingly delicious fried mushrooms at my favorite restaurants, it occurred to me that maybe we’re not as intelligent as we think we are. After all, we’ve been trying with no avail to find Bigfoot since I was a kid. The closest we’ve come was when Steve Austin (the bionic guy… not the wrestler) beat the crap out of him in a two-part episode of The Six Million Dollar Man. Youtube it. It’s still amazing. We live in a world where my phone is smarter than me. It can tell me (as well as any shocker stalker) where I am at any time in an instant. Yet we can’t find Bigfoot? The fact that he and his kind remain so elusive, reclusive and capable of escaping our societal stares is conclusive proof of one thing. They’re way smarter than us. Perhaps, somewhere, in the woods of Pocahontas County, there is a sophisticated Sasquatch civilization in search of us. They’ve been collecting plaster molds of our human footprint for decades. In fact, our very existence could be the topic of a spirited discussion by a clan of well-intentioned, wooly investigators right now. To the Bigfoot researchers determined to debunk the myth of us, I say this. The truth is out there!

– Jim Shock. LBSPY 23 (Dec 31-Jan 14)