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PSEUDO NEWS: OUR NEXT PRESIDENT. BY LARRY BERGER.

Larry Berger, Sinks Grove Correspondent for LBSPY

Somehow all three of us, Homer Smarter, Jim Reacher and I arrived at the post office at the same time. Homer was mailing a package, Jim checking his box and I wanted to get a money order to send to Joni and Friends, that girl that was paralyzed and now she’s sending wheelchairs by the thousands to kids all over the world who need them.

“Whatd’ya think of this election?” asked Homer. He whistled. Jim and I rolled our eyes and looked at the ceiling as if there might be something up there that made sense, some pattern in the ceiling tiles or light coming in through the window, reflected off a parked car.

“Who you liking?” Jim asked Homer.

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“Well, that Bernie fellow sure makes sense to me, but the gals are all talking about it being time for a woman to get in there and show us fellers the right way to run a country. How ‘bout you Jim?

“I like that Trump fella, he could stir things up real good.” Jim turned to me.

“How ‘bout you, who you liking?”

“I don’t think the one I want for President has showed up yet,” I said. “He’s late for the party, took a wrong turn somewhere.” Homer laughed but Jim persisted.

“I’ll bet you’re votin’ for Trump and scared to tell us.”

“If he’s our next president, then we’re in for some interesting times,” I offered.

“But you’re voting, right?” asked Homer.

“Oh, yeah,” I responded, “I always vote.”

“Well, then who for?” asked Jim.

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“Now, I don’t see that that is exactly your business,” I said. “They make them booths private and let you go in there alone. That’s the American way. And I’ll go in there and vote my conscience, just like you, and we’ll get the darned President we all deserve, happens every time.” I was huffing now and Homer and Jim were a little taken aback.

Jim stuffed his old calloused thumbs into his belt and said, “Well, I guess you told me.” He smiled and laughed easily.

Larry Berger - Longing

Homer put an arm over Jim’s shoulder. “He sure did,” he said, and we all walked out of the building into another beautiful spring afternoon, three men with a few different ideas, but good friends.

– Larry Berger. Hashtag Lewisburg #77. May 2016.

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Publisher/Editor in Chief at HashtagWV | + posts

HASHTAGWV ART & ENTERTAINMENT Publisher/Editor-in-Chief, Christina Entenmann-Edwards has been a WV resident since September 2008. She was born and raised in Fairfield County, Connecticut, and is no stranger to hard work and the entrepreneurial spirit. In 2006, she graduated from Quinnipiac University (Hamden, Connecticut), Cum Laude, with a B.A. in History. In 2010, she graduated with an M.B.A. from Liberty University (Lynchburg, Virginia). In February 2012, Christina launched HashtagWV as the area’s first full-color, free arts and entertainment tabloid + online platform. Christina completed the Leadership West Virginia class of 2021, which is an innovative program that grows, engages, and mobilizes leaders to ignite a life passion to move West Virginia forward.