I have a scarf problem. The problem isn’t that I own too many of them – THAT would be my shoe problem. My scarf problem is that I have no idea how to wear a scarf in any way that could be considered stylish. I see women in town with scarves draped casually around their necks or tied in fun little knots, and I envy them. You see, when I wear a scarf, I look like I’m being strangled. I wasn’t blessed with an abundance of graceful, swanlike neck, and as a result I feel like poor little Randy from A Christmas Story – bundled in a cocoon of fabric and struggling to break free. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a silky summer scarf or a warm, wooly one. Either way, I look ridiculous! In the winter, at least I can take off the scarf when I shed my coat, but then I’m always baffled about what to do with it. If I drape it over my coat, it always ends up falling to the floor somehow, lost in the fray at a bar or pilfered by pets at home. I guess it’s too cold to really worry about it, so until I figure out a way to spot-reduce my neck (that’s a thing – right?), try not to laugh when you see me coming!
– Tiffany Blair, LBSPY 21 (Dec 3-17)